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Syn City Gazette
Issue 10
November 4, 2013
Editor-in-Chief - Crissy Forster
Price: 10 Brunsens - 1 issue, 30 Brunsens - Monthly Subscription
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Table of Contents
❖Page 1 - In the News: Keep up-to-date on current events and what's happening in Syn City.
❖Page 2 - Announcements
❖Page 3 - Who's Who - Here, you will get to know your friends and neighbors, perhaps in a way that surprises you!
❖Page 2 - Announcements
❖Page 3 - Who's Who - Here, you will get to know your friends and neighbors, perhaps in a way that surprises you!
❖Page 4 - Lifestyles: Dear Abby, Rumour Has It, Shout Outs
❖Page 5 - Creative Writing Shared
❖Page 6 - Letter to the Editor
❖Page 7 - Want Ads
❖Page 8 - Advertisements
❖Page 6 - Letter to the Editor
❖Page 7 - Want Ads
❖Page 8 - Advertisements
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Page 1: In the News
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2013 ELECTION
Election Day on the way! Voting will opened on Saturday November 2nd and will close at midnight Monday, November 4th. Voting is free and open to Syn City Citizens only.
Mayor candidates:
Fyng
Halo
Whacked
Dolly
Failure
Board members :
Dante - Oso
Eva - Oso
Dina - N/A
Gussy - Vipers
Islandsmoker - Oso
Stormninja -
Amber - Vipers
JJ - DA
Cosmo - Vipers
Dan - Vipers
Alister - DA
Shink - Sinners
You must be a Syn City Resident
The votes WILL be audited.
Each person gets 1 vote for Mayor and 2 votes for council
The runner up in the Mayoral election will be Deputy Mayor
For council there will be 5 members elected.
Please vote wisely
TO VOTE
You MUST create a NEW notecard and write your votes on it and drop it in to the box marked SYN CITY ELECTIONS
Have a say...VOTE.
May the best candidates win!
SYN CITY OPINION POLL 2013!
Written by: Whacked
Written by: Whacked
A survey was also performed on citizen's feelings about several issues. The issues were laid out and citizens were given a simple method of rating the importance of each issue. The ratings were gathered and each issue emerged with an overall rating between one and five. It was interesting to watch the changes in the ratings as people voted and one valuable piece of information that came from the exercise is that people want different things. Not surprising, but the wide spread in which issues people rated highly caused the final result to be centered when the truth is much deeper. People really care passionately about the issues, but the averaging of results by the polling system hides the intensity of these feelings. I was very happy to have been present to watch that and understand why it happened.
Syn City Opinion Poll Results!
Votes Cast: 52 (estimate, some people did not vote on all issues)
RATE THE ISSUES SURVEY RESULTS
► Add City Services ♥♥♥
► More Citywide Events ♥♥♥
► Encourage More Businesses ♥♥♥
► Encourage Inter-gang Business ♥♥♥♥
► Encourage the use of Brunsens ♥♥♥
► More PD Enforcement ♥♥♥
Mayor's Race Results
► Whacked Destiny 27
► Dolly Swizzle 13
► Failure Fatality 8
► Halo 4
► Fying 3
Council Race Results
► Eva Smith 19
► Dina Ormidale 6
► Alister Crowley 5
► Cosmo 8
► Amber 4
► Dante
► Dan Venom 6
► Gussy 4
► Smokey 3
► JJ 3
►► Shink and Stomninja Resident entered the race after the survey was built and they were not included in the survey.
This unofficial poll was fun and interesting to watch but has NO bearing on the actual election. Please come out and VOTE THIS WEEKEND! Voting begins on Saturday and ends on Monday night. So come out and make your opinion known!
The margin of error of this informal poll is near 100% so be careful not to depend on these results.
DANGEROUS CANDY BOWLS
PAINTING THE TOWN
When most refer to "Painting the Town", they're talking about hitting the town having fun but Saturday, three naked girls...two Sinners and one Oso decided to give it a more literal meaning when they decided to paint the SCPD and a police vehicle. The quiet City woke when gunshots were heard as the SCPD set off in chase after the suspects who were naked, splattered in paint and riding getaway trikes. Shortly after apprehending them, they were drug off to the station facing charges of destruction to property, attempted assault, triking while nude, twerking, not using hand signals while triking, and drive-by triking. Officer Gerrard took them to the Hospital for evaluation. At present, the SCPD aren't pressing charges, pending a mental evaluation on the three of them. The girls managed to escape when they were taken to the Hospital for injuries but caught shortly after and once again hauled off to jail.
CHAOS ENSUES AT SCPD
Saturday night, shortly after the arrest of the Painted Sisters, even more chaos ensued when a police cruiser driven by Kyra of DA rammed into Moses Venom's new truck. In the process of getting the two vehicles apart, somehow the truck managed to reverse and back ONTO the police cruiser with Kyra trapped inside. Nearby police officer Will used a chain saw to cut her free. The extent of her injuries at this date is unknown but believed to be serious as threats of lawsuits were shouted towards Moses as well as the SCPD. While Officer Fyng was dealing with the crash, a strange man with swords sheathed at his side, hopped into Moses' new car, not truck, and crashed it into the side of the SCPD causing minor damages to the building but significant damages to the car. Moses faces charges of two destruction to property charges, assault, attempted murder, driving without a license, and attempting to harm an officer of the law. Moses and Cosmo were both arrested and hauled to jail to "work on thier relationship" according to Officer Fyng.
TOUR BUS ROLLOVER
Wolf did another one of his infamous bus tours across Syn today. He lost his driver side mirror when scraping the driver side of the bus against the church during a turn. Then when he got to the bridge the entire bus turned over trapping occupants inside. It took almost an hour to find their way out of the clearly marked exits of the bus as there was plenty of gropes and talk between outnumbered males inside of starting a harem. Eventually they found their way out and SCPD arrived moments later along with an ambulance. The injuries were minor and everyone was sent home.
DA AFTERPARTY
After today's Synful Pleasure event, Isabella thought it was a good idea to have her and her members dress up in fox costumes and dance to the newest internet fab, what did the fox say on repeat. The afterparty was a success as the crowd continued to grow and grow drawing the likes of Moses who mentioned the Vipers can come out for fun too before dressing up and dancing as a fox himself.
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Page 2: Announcements & Events
((IC & OOC))
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Page 2: Announcements & Events
((IC & OOC))
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LOST & FOUND
Sunday an envelope was found outside the Gazette. If you have lost one, please contact the Gazette or Crissy Forster to describe it's contents and retrieve it.
SYNFUL PLEASURES
!!!WARNING!!!
Directly from the CDC...do NOT use any water for drinking or for bathing, it has been contaminated and is considered dangerous including bottled water. Doing so can lead to irritated dry skin, foggy brain, memory loss, and irrational thinking as well as the Axe Effect in some citizens. Instead, make use of the Vodka provided to the citizens of Syn City by the CDC.
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Page 3: Who's Who
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This week in Who's Who, we have Minx Ulysses, the hott bi submissive Asian Capo from Oso's. Minx is the adopted daughter of Samuel and Rayne Ulysses. When one is able to sit down and speak to her without her pink bullets flying at you, it's quite easy to like her. She's a fun-loving girl who "hardly ever gets worked up unless someone ruins my honor" and hates disloyal people. Speaking with her is quite the delight and she's completely not what I expected with her fun loving attitude and hint at a bratty side.
She was the daughter of an ex Yakuza Dragon who's now Chairman. Much of her younger memories fail her due to the harsh realities of life and it's circumstances. She came to Syn a broken girl working the streets as a hoe under Shink for a bit, left and then returned and found a home in the Oso Corporation when they took her in giving her a family once again. She's worked her way up from prostitute to Mafia Capo. Now she does everything and anything needed by the Oso Corporation from dancing at events to acquiring and training new recruits.
Despite the fact that Minx is a bi submissive leaning more towards the females, she's quite picky in who she "deals" with wanting to get to know them first. She is currently available though not searching for anything in particular but rather enjoying the single life and casual "no-strings" sex, with those that have passed her pickiness of course. She seems the type that enjoys challenges, one of which spoken of was turning straight girls not so straight "I've made many straight girls moan with pleasure so to me straight just means your hiding the inner bi self inside you." She's young and has no plans to have any little ones running around anytime soon. When asked about her plans for the future, she stated "like a famous man once said the only thing that's sure about my future is nothing's for sure. I'll just continue what destiny throws at me cause no one's fate is ever determined." Wise words from one so young.
Page 5: Lifestyles
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Dear Abby,
I have been working at a reputable modeling agency for almost a year now. Recently there was a shake up and new management was brought in. They absolutely don't know what they are doing because they have absolutely no experience. They won't listen to those who do and are using unconventional methods to control us loyal employees. When we stand up, we are humiliated until we give in. It is not fair we are being used to boost their social status while the big bosses believe they are some sort of saviors. Being under a contract we can't just leave. Sweet Abby, How can I get new management to listen and learn from someone who is a lot more experienced then they are?
- Molly Trizzles
Dear Molly Trizzles
Its always hard to make any changes in a company and esp harder taking orders from people you don't know that well. You can always pull them off to the side alone ,when they are around no one and express how you feel. You may find out they know more than you think they do and they may respect you for pulling them to the side as one person other than trying to call them out in front of everyone and may be more willing to listen to what you have to say . Stay positive and if that doesn't work out just do what you have to do to get done there and it may be time to move on if it bothers you that bad. As time goes by they may get more experience and see the things they thought were working, aren't. SO either just stick around and see what happens or just try to talk to them 1 on 1 and see what good that will do. I hope this has helped you and good luck in your future
xoxoxox
COSMOgirl
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Dear Cosmogirl,
So many guys around here are such idiots..and massive liars...how do you tell the difference?
Dear girl who is frustrated,
It can be veryyy hard to tell the difference in idiots and liars and the good guys. I think that it is a situation where you have to truly be friends first. If you can't be best friends it's very unlikely you can be lovers. You need a solid foundation so that they will respect you and respect who you are as a person. Syn can be a hard place to find love, it's not going to be easy, but no one said it isn't worth it . Just try to find you a set of good friends and go from there. Dont rush anything that's where you find the sleezeballs and liars . Don't make yourself too available and don't focus on FINDING the perfect guy. Focus on finding a good friend and things will fall into place if it's meant to be. Hope this helps and good luck
XOXOXO
COSMOgirl
**Want to ask Cosmo Girl for advice? Simply drop a note in the mailbox outside the Gazette behind Syn City Bank, Cosmo Girl responds to everyone!** ((NOTE: Crissy rewrites all Dear Cosmo Girl's before handing them over to Cosmo to answer so they can be kept anonymous.))
❖ Rumor Has It
**Have you heard a rumour you want to share? Send it to us.**
1. Cosmo and Moses will soon bring a lil one to the streets of Syn as Cosmo is pregnant with Mo's child! Be sure to tell them congratulations!
2. Mass Parkin is suspected to be narcoleptic. He's been caught falling asleep on the bridge and by the bank this week. He must have fallen asleep on his way to pick up his welfare.
3. Been having trouble defeating that annoying level in Candy Crush? Apparently, Oso is to blame! They've hacked into the systems and are to blame for all those difficult, annoying levels that are so hard to pass.
4. Shink has the hots for Sam, Black's Queen. He has been seen trying to win her over singing songs to her and giving her pussy. Song's and gifts!?! Question is...what does Black have to say about it?
5. The SCPD has been taking a more active role this week arresting citizens for anything from warrants served due to shooting others to carding Synizens for their G&D licenses. Are they doing good or are they making up the reasons for arrests? On more then one occasion, we hear, there is no reason for the arrest...either it wasn't given or the reason given was false such as bribing an officer of the law when one asks how much another's fines are going to be.
6. It's been reported that Officer Fyng has been seen buying drugs from a DA member and allowing Synizens to drive a police issued vehicle for unofficial business. I wonder what the new Mayor will have to say about the waste of tax payer's money?
8. Clap is spreading throughout the City once more. Three suspects who were taken into custody late in the week are believed to have contracted the STD. Where and how is still unknown.
9. Sere is a coward that runs to hide from the Queen not once but twice because she is too scared to fight her alone.
10. Mayoral candidate Dolly got a boob job this week. Was it an investment by the Vipers with the Election already here and foreseeing her loss or was it an attempt at buying more votes by a Campaign donor?
**Have you heard a rumour you want to share? Send it to us.**
❖ Shout Outs
!!!Be sure to congratulate Craig & Dina Ormidale on their 3rd Anniversary on November 8th. Three years and going stronger then ever!!!
Wanna give a shout out to someone? Have a message you want delivered in a different way? Know someone with a birthday coming up and want to wish them a happy one?
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Page 6: Creative Writing Shared
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Page 6: Creative Writing Shared
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LIFE IS A PUZZLE
Written by: Dan Venom
Life is a puzzle,
Life is a puzzle there is things we must solve on are own, pieces lost and needed to be place in right places. when i say it is like A puzzle i mean that from burdens to troubles. one thing you try to solve while anther you trying to complete but you then realize you are still missing a piece. puzzle pieces are People's places or things. that you want to keep together but is apart everyone starts the puzzle from start. lesson to live by live life don't rush or you will have the wrong pieces stuck.
Life is a puzzle. There are things we must solve on our own, pieces lost and needed to be place in right places.
When I say it is like A puzzle, I mean that from burdens to troubles. One thing you try to solve while another you're trying to complete but you then realize you are still missing a piece.
Puzzle pieces are people, places, or things that you want to keep together but is apart. Everyone starts the puzzle from start. Lesson to live by...don't rush life or you will have the wrong pieces stuck.
Life is a puzzle there is things we must solve on are own, pieces lost and needed to be place in right places. when i say it is like A puzzle i mean that from burdens to troubles. one thing you try to solve while anther you trying to complete but you then realize you are still missing a piece. puzzle pieces are People's places or things. that you want to keep together but is apart everyone starts the puzzle from start. lesson to live by live life don't rush or you will have the wrong pieces stuck.
Life is a puzzle. There are things we must solve on our own, pieces lost and needed to be place in right places.
When I say it is like A puzzle, I mean that from burdens to troubles. One thing you try to solve while another you're trying to complete but you then realize you are still missing a piece.
Puzzle pieces are people, places, or things that you want to keep together but is apart. Everyone starts the puzzle from start. Lesson to live by...don't rush life or you will have the wrong pieces stuck.
Have something you've written you want to share? Send it in to the Gazette and share your talents with Synizens.
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Page 7: Letter to the Editor
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Have something you wanna say? Here's your chance to be heard! Send in
your letters to the Editor and give yourself a voice to be heard!Page 7: Letter to the Editor
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Page 8: Want Ads
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❖ Vipers Garage is now hiring everything from pump girls and cashiers to mechanics! No experience necessary although for mechanics, experience is preferred. Stop by and put in an application or speak to Amber Venom (karmarider) today!
❖ New to Syn City and not sure where to go or what to do? Been looking for a job and just can't seem to find one and having to live on the streets from one empty spot to the next? If so, Holly Molly Maid's Service might be the place for you. Holly Molly is now accepting applications. Come visit Holly Molly down at the docks and put in your application today or contact Amber Venom (karmarider).
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Page 9: Advertisements
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❖ In love and wanting to be joined in holy matrimony? Contact Icarurs Blackgraves. He specializes in speed weddings...anytime, anywhere . When you just absolutely need to get married he's the one to do it for you. Certified online. Dial 1-800-MARRYME. He also does also for exorcisms, deliveries, hit jobs, private eye investigating, grave digging, and Psychiatric services.
❖ Looking for something warm and moist to eat? Have you been craving meat? Come on out to Moretti's where they're always serving up the hot stuff. Wednesday's all Medium pizzas are just 10 B and on Fridays, it's buy one get one FREE.
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Got
ideas or suggestions? Let us know. If you have something you'd like
to include in the next issue, drop a note in the mailbox outside Syn
City Gazette's Office located just behind Syn City Bank.
*******************************************************************************DISCLAIMER: LET IT BE KNOWN, THAT NO MATTER WHAT IS WRITTEN IN THIS PUBLICATION, UNLESS STATED OTHERWISE, IT IS STRICTLY IN CHARACTER!!! I SHOULD INFORM YOU, I CONSIDER EVENTS FOR THE MOST PART IC...FOR THE MOST PART LOL. ABSOLUTELY NO OOC INSULTS WILL EVER BE USED...EVER!!! SO IF YOU FEEL SOMETHING IS DIRECTED TOWARD YOU OOCLY, AND YOU TAKE OFFENSE, UNDERSTAND THAT YOU ARE MISTAKEN!!! RUMORS ARE FOR FUN ONLY, WITH NO MALICE IN MIND AND THEY ARE USUALLY NOT EVEN TRUE!!!
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